Be My Guest

I’m having a pity party and your invited.
My subconscious has a way of working on things and I knew this one had been bothering me for a few days and it was time to bring it to the surface via this blog. Actually the culmination was in the McDonalds I inhaled a few hours ago. McDonalds is like a bad night of drinking. It happens every so often you regret it terribly and swear it off for life and usually for me it results in clinging to the toilet bowl for dear life (I’ll let you know in a few hours if that happens). So getting to the point of why I am upset. It’s TLC. It’s this show on TLC. “Little People: Just Married. “ Now this has nothing to do with begrudging anyone happiness, and certainly not the little people who totally got the short end of the genetic stick. BUT there are not many little people in the world. It just irritated me that the odds of compatible little people meeting each other and hitting it off is like 10 zillion to one and I live in a city chock full of people my size with a compatibility factor of Negativo. Who am I finding? Humorless, literal, romanticless, silo thinkers. Is it too much to ask to be swept off my feet by a perceptive, multi-dimensional, heartthrob (you know, like Brody Jenner)? I think not. Out of 8 million people how come I keep seeing the same ones? I’ve tried taking new routes to work, changing up my bars, cafes, library etc. I am stuck in a rut. So I am taking suggestions (and applications). This is a call to arms for all interesting takers who want to be my BFF. One thing is for sure, if I keep drowning the lameness sorrows in McDonalds I can add Weight Watchers to my list of place to meet my little person.